Nasrudin Jokes
Posted by Tunga on March 14, 1998 at 10:48:24:

One day Nasrudin was walking along a deserted road. Night was
falling as he spied a troop of horsemen coming toward him. His
imagination began to work, and he feared that they might rob him,
or impress him into the army. So strong did this fear become that
he leaped over a wall and found himself in a graveyard. The other
travelers, innocent of any such motive as had been assumed by
Nasrudin, became curious and pursued him.

When they came upon him lying motionaless, one said, "Can we help
you? And, why are you here in this position?"

Nasrudin, realizing his mistake said, "It is more complicated
than you assume. You see, I am here because of you; and you, you
are here because of me."

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EVEN THE INNOCENCE HAVE GUILT

One day he disagreed with the prior of a monastery at which he
was staying. Shortly afterward, a bag of rice was missing. The
prior ordered everyone to line up in the courtyard. Then he told
them that the man who had stolen the rice had some grains of it in
his beard.

"This is an old trick, to make the guilty party touch his beard
involuntarily," thought the real thief, and stood firm.

Nasrudin, on the other hand, thought, "The prior is out to
revenge himself upon me. He must have planted rice in my beard!"
He tried to brush it off as inconspicuously as he could.

As his fingers combed his beard, he realized that everyone was
looking at him.

"I knew, somehow, that he would trap me sooner or later," said
Nasrudin.

-----

The Mulla Nasrudin once walked in his garden with one of his
servants. The servant cried that he had just encountered Death,
who had threatened him. He begged his master to give him his
fastest horse so that he could make haste and flee to Teheran,
which he could reach that same evening. The Mulla consented and
the servant galloped off on the horse.

On returning to his house the Mulla himself met Death, and
questioned him, "Why did you terrify and threaten my servant?"

"I did not threaten him; I only showed surprised in still finding
him here when I planned to meet him tonight in Teheran."

-----

BORROWING MONEY

One day Nasrudin asked a wealthy man for some money.

"What do you want it for?"

"To buy an elephant."

"If you have no money you will not be able to maintain an
elephant."

"I asked for money, not advice!"

-----

ON THE ACT OF EATING AS COMMUNION WITH NATURE

One day Nasrudin saw a strange-looking building at whose door a
contemplative Yogi sat. The Mulla decided that he would learn
something from this impressive figure, and started a conversation
by asking him who and what he was.

"I am a Yogi," said the other, "and I spend my time in trying to
attain harmony with all living things."

"That is interesting," said Nasrudin, "because a fish once saved
my life."
The Yogi begged him to join him, saying that in a lifetime
devoted to trying to harmonize himself with the animal creation, he
had never been so close to such communion as the Mulla had been.

When they had been contemplating for some days, the Yogi begged
the Mulla to tell him more of his wonderful experience with the
fish, "now that we know one another better."

"Now that I know you better," said Nasrudin, "I doubt whether you
would profit by what I have to tell."

But the Yogi insisted. "Very well," said Nasrudin. "The fish
saved my life all right. I was starving at the time, and it
sufficed me for three days."

-----

EATING TOO MUCH SUGAR

When Nasrudin was a magistrate, a woman came to him with her son.
"This youth," she said, "eats too much sugar; I cannot afford to
keep him in it. Therefore I ask you formally to forbid him to eat
it, as he will not obey me."

Nasrudin told her to come back in seven days.

When she returned, he postponed his decision for yet another
week.

"Now," he said to the youth, "I forbid you eat more than such and
such a quantity of sugar every day."

The woman subsequently asked him why so time had been necesary
before a simple order could be given.

"Because, madam, I had to see whether I myself could cut down on
the use of sugar, before ordering anyone else to do it."

--------------------------

THE DUCK SOUP

A friend of Nasrudin visited him one day with a duck as a gift. Nasrudin
was very happy to receive such a rare and expensive gift. He killed the
duck and made a delicious soup from it and enjoyed it with the friend.

Several days later, a stranger came asking for Nasrudin. Upon inquiring
asrudin was told that he is a friend of the friend that brought the duck.
So Nasrudin invited him to have dinner with him and offered some duck soup
still left in the house.

Few days later another stranger appeared claiming that he is a friend of
the friend of the friend that brought the duck. Nasrudin, a bit annoyed
nevertheless invited him to supper and offered him a soup.

Yet another day, one more friend of the friend... came to see Nasruddin.
Without further questions Nasrudin offered him a soup.

"This is the worst ever soup I tasted. It tastes alsmost like water. Is
this the way you treat a friend of a friend of a ...?" the angry friend
shouted.

"Pardon me sir, this is a soup made from the soup, that was made from the
soup,..... that was made from the duck."

---------------------

LITERACY OF NASRUDIN

A women came to Nasrudin and told,
"Sir, I want to send a letter to my daughter in Tehran. As I don't know how
to read and write, will you please write a letter for me?"

"You see, I injured my leg yesterday. So I can not write any letters now."

"But excuse me sir, why can not you write a letter? It is not the hand that
injured."

"You don't understand madam. I have to go to Tehran to read that letter for
them, as only I can read a letter that I wrote. That means you have to wait
till my leg get cured."

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