In the wake of the Federal anti-trust
suit against Microsoft, Sony has
announced its own computer operating
system now available on its hot new
portable PC called the Vaio.

Instead of producing the cryptic
error messages characteristic of
Microsoft's Windows 95, 3.1, and
DOS operating systems, Sony's chairman
Asai Tawara said, "We intend to capture
the high ground by putting a human,
Japanese face on what has been --
until now -- an operating system that
reflects Western cultural hegemony.
For example, we have replaced the
usual impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft
error messages with our own
Japanese haiku poetry."

The chairman went on to give examples
of Sony's new error messages:

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A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.

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The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist

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Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.

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ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have.
You ask way too much.

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First snow, then silence.
This thousand dollar screen dies
so beautifully.

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With searching comes loss
and the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found.

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The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao, until
You bring fresh toner.

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Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.

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Stay the patient course
Of little worth is your ire
The network is down

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A crash reduces
your expensive computer
to a simple stone.

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Yesterday it worked
Today it is not working
Windows is like that

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Three things are certain:
Death, taxes, and lost data.
Guess which has occurred.

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You step in the stream,
but the water has moved on.
This page is not here.

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Out of memory.
We wish to hold the whole sky,
But we never will.

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Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.

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Rather than a beep
Or a rude error message,
These words: "File not found."

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Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.

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