*LOVE - when your eyes meet across a crowded room.
*LUST - when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
*MARRIAGE - when your belt won't meet around your waist, and you don't care.

*LOVE - when intercourse is called making love.
*LUST - all other times.
*MARRIAGE - what's intercourse?

*LOVE - when you argue over how many children to have.
*LUST - when you argue over who gets the wet spot.
*MARRIAGE - when you argue over money.

*LOVE - when you share everything you own.
*LUST - when you think twice about giving your partner bus money.
*MARRIAGE - when the bank owns everything.

*LOVE - when it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
*LUST - when the relationship is over if you don't climax.
*MARRIAGE - what's a climax?

*LOVE - when you phone each other just to say "Gidday".
*LUST - when you phone each other just to organize sex.
*MARRIAGE - when you phone each other to find out what time your son's game starts.

*LOVE - when you write poems about your partner.
*LUST - when all you write is your phone number.
*MARRIAGE - when all you write is cheques.

*LOVE - when you show concern for your partners' feelings.
*LUST - when you couldn't give a shit.
*MARRIAGE - when your only concern is what's on TV.

*LOVE - when your farewell is "I love you darling ...".
*LUST - when your farewell is "So, same time next week?".
*MARRIAGE - when your farewell is silent.

*LOVE - when your heart flutters everytime you see them.
*LUST - when your groin twitches everytime you see them.
*MARRIAGE - when your wallet empties everytime you see them.

*LOVE - when nobody else matters.
*LUST - when nobody else knows.
*MARRIAGE - when everybody else matters and you don't care who knows.

*LOVE - when all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
*LUST - when it's just the same mushy old shit.
*MARRIAGE - when you never listen to music.

*LOVE - when breaking up is something you try not to think about.
*LUST - when staying together is something you try not to think about.
*MARRIAGE - when just getting through today is your only thought.

*LOVE - when you're interested in everything your partner does.
*LUST - when you're only interested in one thing.
*MARRIAGE - when you're not interested in what your partner does and the one thing you're interested in is your golf score.