Mr. Alahajohn, our well-known rugby master-in-charge, is on a plane at 29,000 ft. He gets the urge to smoke but finds that he's on a non-smoking flight. Determined to smoke somehow, he calls the air hostess over and says, "I want to talk to your captain!" She replies, "I'm sorry, sir, but he's busy flying the plane." Never the one to back down, Mr. Alahajohn thinks for a few seconds and says" okay..okay...then I want to speak to your vice-captain!"