CHRISTMAS CARD

I was taking a shower when my 2-year-old son came into the
bathroom and wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he made a
mess, he looked adorable, so I ran for my camera and took a few
shots. They came out so well that I had copies made and included
one with each of our Christmas cards. Days later, a relative
called about the picture, laughing hysterically and suggesting I
take a closer look. Puzzled, I stared at the photo and was
shocked to discover that in addition to my son, I had captured my reflection in the mirror -- wearing nothing but a camera!

MY FOOTSTEPS?

An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about
her then-four-year-old daughter. On the way to preschool, the
doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little
girl picked it up and began playing with it. "Be still, my
heart," thought my friend, "my daughter wants to follow in my
footsteps!" Then the child spoke into the instrument, "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order?"

A WISE LITTLE GIRL

A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said, "Aren't you Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?" She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."

TOO ROUGH

A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with
the boys?" Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough." The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked, "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"

THUMB SUCKING

A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the
habit. Finally she tried threats, warning her son that, "If you
don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up
like a balloon." Later that day, walking in the park, mother and
son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old
considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying,
"Uh-oh .. I know what you've been doing."

SO KEEP THE SINGING DOWN, OK?

A Sunday school teacher asked her little children, as they were
on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be
quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."