When the husband finally died his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhoea.

No sooner were the papers delivered than a good friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, "You know very well that he died of diarrhoea, not gonorrhoea."

Replied the widow, "I nursed him night and day so of course I know he died of diarrhoea, but I thought it would be better for posterity to remember him as a great lover rather than the big shit he always was."