A mature (over 40!) lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer : Ma'am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, that's not possible.
Officer : Could I see your license please?
Older Woman: Well, I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer : Don't have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer : I see...Well, can you give me your vehicle registration papers?
Older Woman: I can't do that.
Officer : Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer : Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer : You... what??!
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see...

The Officer is shocked; he stares at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the woman's car. A senior officer slowly approaches her, clasping his half drawn gun.

Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: Well, I don't know...One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, would you open the trunk of your car, please.
The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty space.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers. The officer is stunned.
Officer 2: But Ma'am...One of my officers here claims that you do not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer. The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled..
Officer 2: Thank you ma'am. I'm sorry we had to bother you, but one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman: Aah ha! Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.