1. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
2. Why do men prefer women's company?
Men always like intellectual company.
3. Why do men like love at first sight?
It saves them a lot of time.
4. A woman of 35 thinks of having children. What does a man of 35 think of?
Chasing teenagers.
5. Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
For the same reason dogs chase vehicles they have no intention of driving.
6. Why are husbands like lawn mowing machines?
They're hard to get started, emit foul odours, and don't work when you want them to.
7. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
A dog is always happy to see you and a dog only takes a couple of months to train
8. Why is sleeping with a man like a teledrama?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
9. Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
10. If men got pregnant.... abortion would be available in all the medical clinics in town.
11. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because they already have boyfriends.
12. Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing much to put in it.
Wife: You wear briefs, don't you?
13. How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable".
14. How do men exercise on the beach?
By sucking in their stomach everytime they see a bikini
15. Why is a woman different from a PC?
A woman won't accept a 3½" floppy
16. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
17. Why do so many women fake orgasm?
Because so many men fake foreplay.